10 Essential Skills for Effective Communication
From successinspired.com, here are 10 basic ingredients good communication, which if practiced well, will build relationships, open doors, improve confidence and create friendships.
Be a Good Listener
Listening is the basis of all communication. It creates the channel by which true exchange can take place. It is a gift. Dean Rusk says, "One of the best ways to persuade other is with your ears- by listening to them." Being a good listener is so rare that if you have it, you will be welcome and appreciated everywhere.
Be Present
You think people don’t know when you’re not listening? Think again. You can only connect with a person if you are completely attuned to them as you are with them. Think about other things at other times. Live the precious present.
Have Something Good to Say
Louis Nizer said " Words of comfort, skillfully administered, are the oldest therapy known to man". See a need and fill it. Have an active interest in the other person and what's going on, and you will make a difference in the lives of others.
It’s Not Just What You Say, but How You Say It
Your body language can speak louder than words. The head never hears until the heart has listened. Speak with passion, project warmth empathy and caring. People are more likely to be won over by what you do than what you say.
You Are Responsible for both the Sending and the Receiving of Your Message
Checking to ensure your message was correctly received reassures others that you have been listening. Make sure the other has grasped your exact meaning. When listening, make sure that you fully understand what is said,
Be Aware of Barriers that Exist
For example, there may be psychological barriers– we have tendency to hear what we want and screen out what we find unacceptable. Another barrier is in the emotions- people who feel insecure, anxious suspicious resentful and are prone to distorting what they say or hear.
Focus on the Content
Sometimes the delivery of a message can turn you off. Even you find the language or ideas distasteful or offensive, keep listening. The other party won't open up to you if they think you are being prudish or judgmental.
Learn to Read Body Language
Listen with your ears and your eyes. You may read more than you hear.
Silence is Sometimes Okay
When the person you are speaking with pauses, resist the temptation to jump in. Allow silence to fill the air for a moment, important thoughts are often the product of even momentary reflection.
Don’t be a One-Upper
Listen. Understand. Don’t speak immediately of an experience you’ve had that matches or sounds similar to what is being talked about. Enjoy what the other person is saying without feeling a need to reply with in-kind comments.